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Joy in the Journey

February 20, 2014

by Linda Beerman
We've just finished a week that held Valentine's Day, a time when love is especially celebrated between those who are young and those whose love has endured the years of time. Today I want to share with you a few highlights from a new book entitled Happy Wives Club. Because I am a sold out believer in marriage, this book, written by Fawn Weaver, was especially of interest to me. The premise of this writing is for the author to prove two things: 1. That happy marriages are alive and well. 2. That there are universal truths to happy and successful marriages.

This novelist set out to visit twelve countries on six continents to find the twelve secrets of a great marriage. The volume allows us to hear stories, witness love, and be inspired by the fact that happy, healthy marriages do exist. If you enjoy reading (and especially if you are married), I would encourage you to check it out for yourself. To stimulate your interest, I would like to share a thumbnail sketch of the twelve points she determined as the foundation of her searching and findings.

1. Respect. This being mutual for each other.

2. Trust. An essential ingredient that is almost a natural result from respect.

3. Belief in God. Even though not all may have believed in the same God, they had a deep reverence for a higher being; someone greater than themselves.

4. Laughter. They had fun together and laughed a lot. Their relationships were lighthearted, and they could laugh at themselves and each other with no malice.

5. Keep Outside Interests. These couples had seperate identities like hobbies and work outside of their home and families. This kept them from smothering each other.

6. Daily Rituals. Connections that they shared together every day. Examples were meals together, coffee or tea time, sharing the mail or devotions.

7. Date Your Spouse. Regular dates were a must, especially during raising children, but continuing on through marriage. Some were weekly, others less often.

8. Support Your Spouse. Supported one another through life changes, careers, hobbies, interests. Constantly building each other up. Which spouse brought in the most money did not matter.

9. Friendship Is Essential. Above all else, these couples are each other's best friend and also each other's number one confidant. They all have outside friends, but they have spent the most time building their spousal friendships.

10. Nurture Your Marriage. Every couple put their marriage as the number one relationship in their lives. Yes, children were "right up there" during child rearing, but the marital relationship would need to continue to grow.

11. No Plan "B" Divorce was never an option, so they felt they had a much greater level of patience with each other. They took time, with out worry, to resolve disagreements. Sometimes they just agreed to disagree.

12. Choose Friends Wisely These people surrounded themselves with others who build up marriage: People who believe in the power of love and the ability of marriage to last a lifetime.

lbeerman@lismoretel.com


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